living beyond the quest

Monday, March 28, 2005

I feel ugly!

OK, so I don't normally care about my appearance. I happen to think I look fine! I know I'm not flawless, but who is, and I'm not going waste my time trying to look perfect. There are so many better things to do with my time. I generally spend about five minutes getting ready for my day. Mostly, I put on casual clothes, brush my teeth and put my hair in a ponytail. I purposely grew my hair long, because I happen to think it's beautiful and long hair looks more like I care about my hair. So, in order to not have to do any work and maybe look professional, I grew it long. It's just a disguise. Sadly I just put it in a ponytail. Last week some people made some comments about my appearance. They weren't hurtful things, just suggestions for improvement. I was shocked. They were simple things like, have you considered contacts? They use the old line of your eyes are beautiful so you should wear contacts. And also maybe that I should exercise which I took to mean you should lose some weight. I know that these things might improve my appearance, but once again I don't really care. After these comments, I thought I dismissed them from my mind, however, over the last few day's they have been on my mind. My first though on Easter Sunday was, maybe I should go running this morning. I hate running and why did I think of that instead of Jesus. I was surprised that I kept thinking about them, and then today, I realized I was considering getting contacts. I couldn't believe these comments had affected me so much, and were making me feel insecure. Then I thought, I think it's important for people to become comfortable with our imperfections. My desire for those people who made these comments, is that they learn to see and love all of me just as I am. To also see everyone else as wonderful, not based on their appearance. We have such a tendency to judge based on appearance in this society. It is such a huge problem.
Needless to say, I am seriously considering exercising more and getting contacts. Does that totally seem like I don't practice what I preach. If it is any consolation to you all, I probably will not exercise. I have never been able to stay committed to exercising.

2 Comments:

Blogger Ron said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

5:59 p.m.

 
Blogger Ron said...

O Susana you are beautiful!! This http://www.vanl.freeserve.co.uk/images/humour/Ugly.jpg is ugly and until you look like that I agree that you have nothing to be concerned about.

6:01 p.m.

 

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